Oh What a Night! - Catholic Night at Heaven
Our Religious Affairs correspondent was lucky enough to receive an invite to the party of all parties, yes the Catholic Coming Out night at the so, so trendy and hot nightclub Heaven in London last Friday. We here present his, near breathless at times, report and interview with Monsignor Santo Avrilo, the spokesperson for the Once Secret But Now No More Gay Cabal.
- Well, with me here the next day, over strong coffee and toast, I have Monsignor Avrilo. Welcome Sir.
- Nice to be here, really, really nice.
- So was it fun last night?
- Oh My Lord Yes, Oh My Lord it was so fine.
- Just so as out readers can get an idea of the momentous nature of this past
event, as it wasn't really just all disco, poppers and glitter now was it?
- No, no, it was momentous as you say. Well The Secret Gay Cabal had been
around since the early Middle Ages. We had obviously tried to keep a low profile
but did try to keep things happening at the weekends, parties and such, all-in
vacations to Rio and Bangkok, you know things like that. In more recent times
we have had some wonderfully successful cross-dressing do's, you know 'Come
as Your Favourite Film Star' things alike that, and could I say sweetheart we had
exceptional Judy Garlands and Marilyn's, oh so wonderful, the memories, the
memories.
- Sounds like a lovely night out Monsignor.
- Oh honey, call me Santo, please.
- Well, as I say Santo, sounds glorious for you all, but wasn't this all secret, my the
logistics of it all, the toing and fringe, the frocks, the hair, the glamour, how did
you manage it al?
- Well yes, it was hard, so very hard, but we did, we pulled it off. But of course its
such a sweet sweet relief to be able to put on our Catholic Night here at
Heaven, just loud and proud, but at the same time just relieved that the secrecy
is all over and done with now.
- Yes, I would imagine so Santo, now that the Once Secret Gay Cabal is no
longer a secret gay cabal, and thats what last night was all about is it not?
- Yes, such a relief, such a joy, and to see so many of the clergy here tonight.
My goodness did you see the Prelates getting down, my my … and the
Bishop of Milwaukee, lord lord, I almost blushed a bright , bright pink …oh my
such times …
- And El Popo himself of course.
- Yes El Popo, boy did he look happy.
- Well he did have those ladyboy handmaidens did he not?
- Oh yes, weren't they lovely, so lovely, lucky, lucky, man. We chartered a jet
from Thailand and just filled it to the rafters … filled it … oh those lovelys …
such sweet boy-girls too, but frisky though, let em tell you …
- Yes I saw you enjoying your self there.
- Well of course, who could resist, certainly not the members of The Once Secret
Gay cabal, oh know, oh know, we couldn't resist that … so sweet, so sweet …
- And the music?
- Oh yes, the sounds. We tried for an authentic yet nostalgic gay night. Tried and
names were there of course … Madonna, Boy George, Rihanna by satellite,
also some tribute performers from the glory days … Sylvester, Gloria Gaynor,
but no Village People, not this time, they were unfortunately booked elsewhere
The Secret Gay Cabal of the U.S. Senate I believe …
- And the backrooms? Some I couldn't even get a peek in.
- Oh yes, well, the backrooms, what times what times …. centuries of acting in
the dark brought into the light, so to speak, even if it was closely monitored by a
doorman.
- Yes, well I can only imagine …
- Oh yes honey, imagine away, Ha!
- So finally Santo, a great night?
- Oh yes a mighty night, loved it, loved it.
- Any future plans?
- Well I have been in touch with The Secret Communist Cabal, they are of
course a serious lot, but the stories of last night are already getting around and
I hear they are really, really ready to party down.
- In Heaven again?
- No, we have plans, well not plans just some ideas … we're thinking of
occupying a Trump Tower or somesuch … there'll we massive giveaways,
free food etc etc … we could actually run a kinda secret rave scene thingy
where we occupy and loot and plunder and dance and fuck and drink and
smoke in the very best palaces throughout the world … but that is a secret is
it not, our cabals and their plans.
- Oh yes, secret.
They both smile.
Our Religious Affairs correspondent was lucky enough to receive an invite to the party of all parties, yes the Catholic Coming Out night at the so, so trendy and hot nightclub Heaven in London last Friday. We here present his, near breathless at times, report and interview with Monsignor Santo Avrilo, the spokesperson for the Once Secret But Now No More Gay Cabal.
- Well, with me here the next day, over strong coffee and toast, I have Monsignor Avrilo. Welcome Sir.
- Nice to be here, really, really nice.
- So was it fun last night?
- Oh My Lord Yes, Oh My Lord it was so fine.
- Just so as out readers can get an idea of the momentous nature of this past
event, as it wasn't really just all disco, poppers and glitter now was it?
- No, no, it was momentous as you say. Well The Secret Gay Cabal had been
around since the early Middle Ages. We had obviously tried to keep a low profile
but did try to keep things happening at the weekends, parties and such, all-in
vacations to Rio and Bangkok, you know things like that. In more recent times
we have had some wonderfully successful cross-dressing do's, you know 'Come
as Your Favourite Film Star' things alike that, and could I say sweetheart we had
exceptional Judy Garlands and Marilyn's, oh so wonderful, the memories, the
memories.
- Sounds like a lovely night out Monsignor.
- Oh honey, call me Santo, please.
- Well, as I say Santo, sounds glorious for you all, but wasn't this all secret, my the
logistics of it all, the toing and fringe, the frocks, the hair, the glamour, how did
you manage it al?
- Well yes, it was hard, so very hard, but we did, we pulled it off. But of course its
such a sweet sweet relief to be able to put on our Catholic Night here at
Heaven, just loud and proud, but at the same time just relieved that the secrecy
is all over and done with now.
- Yes, I would imagine so Santo, now that the Once Secret Gay Cabal is no
longer a secret gay cabal, and thats what last night was all about is it not?
- Yes, such a relief, such a joy, and to see so many of the clergy here tonight.
My goodness did you see the Prelates getting down, my my … and the
Bishop of Milwaukee, lord lord, I almost blushed a bright , bright pink …oh my
such times …
- And El Popo himself of course.
- Yes El Popo, boy did he look happy.
- Well he did have those ladyboy handmaidens did he not?
- Oh yes, weren't they lovely, so lovely, lucky, lucky, man. We chartered a jet
from Thailand and just filled it to the rafters … filled it … oh those lovelys …
such sweet boy-girls too, but frisky though, let em tell you …
- Yes I saw you enjoying your self there.
- Well of course, who could resist, certainly not the members of The Once Secret
Gay cabal, oh know, oh know, we couldn't resist that … so sweet, so sweet …
- And the music?
- Oh yes, the sounds. We tried for an authentic yet nostalgic gay night. Tried and
names were there of course … Madonna, Boy George, Rihanna by satellite,
also some tribute performers from the glory days … Sylvester, Gloria Gaynor,
but no Village People, not this time, they were unfortunately booked elsewhere
The Secret Gay Cabal of the U.S. Senate I believe …
- And the backrooms? Some I couldn't even get a peek in.
- Oh yes, well, the backrooms, what times what times …. centuries of acting in
the dark brought into the light, so to speak, even if it was closely monitored by a
doorman.
- Yes, well I can only imagine …
- Oh yes honey, imagine away, Ha!
- So finally Santo, a great night?
- Oh yes a mighty night, loved it, loved it.
- Any future plans?
- Well I have been in touch with The Secret Communist Cabal, they are of
course a serious lot, but the stories of last night are already getting around and
I hear they are really, really ready to party down.
- In Heaven again?
- No, we have plans, well not plans just some ideas … we're thinking of
occupying a Trump Tower or somesuch … there'll we massive giveaways,
free food etc etc … we could actually run a kinda secret rave scene thingy
where we occupy and loot and plunder and dance and fuck and drink and
smoke in the very best palaces throughout the world … but that is a secret is
it not, our cabals and their plans.
- Oh yes, secret.
They both smile.
No comments:
Post a Comment